Death is strange and can never be proud

This week’s Mediahuis Irish regional newspapwrs’ column

Michel Commane

Death is strange. The older I get the stranger it appears. When I was younger death was something that happened other people.

 

Sixteenth century poet, John Donne writes in one of his holy sonnets: 'Death, be not proud, though some have called thee/ Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so’. Words that resonate with me.

I was fortunate to have my parents into my adulthood. I can’t imagine what it must be like for parents to lose a child or indeed for young siblings to lose a sister or brother. 

And then, just look around the world and see what is happening every minute of every day. Unspeakable crimes, acts of barbarity, where children and young women and men are being slaughtered, whether it be in the Middle East or in Ukraine or indeed across the Africa continent.

The world spent €224 billion last year on armaments, whose purpose is to kill, maim and destroy. Isn’t it amazing how we take it for granted and shrug our shoulders at such a statistic.

Closer to home the number of people who have been killed on our roads so far this year is edging towards 80.

 

Life is special, every life is unique. When someone dies it has a ripple effect on those left behind.

On Tuesday, May 14 as I watched the coffin of Breda, a friend and neighbour, lowered into the drench-filled ground of a cemetery I was asking myself what next for Breda? Is there a life after death? And if there be, what form does it take? As a Christian I believe in life after death. We have just come out of the Easter season, which is the celebration of life over death. Easter is all to do with resurrection and new life.

But also, as Breda’s mortal remains were lowered into the soil I thought of the life she lived.

Breda was 72 when she died. She was a tiny person in physique and because of ill-health had retired many years ago from teaching, a career she greatly enjoyed. 

And she must have been a great teacher. I was astounded to see the number of her former colleagues and students who added their condolences on RIP.ie. From my reckoning Breda retired from teaching close to 40 years ago.

I knew Breda for the best part of 45 years and I never once heard her say a bad word about anyone. The closest she ever came to criticise anyone was me and she did it straight to my face. The number of people who have come to me since Breda’s death to say what a star she was has not surprised me. 

Young and old appreciated the powerful person she was. A young German woman in the village explained to me, with a tear in her eye, that Breda was the first person who welcomed her to the village. 

Someone else said: ‘She made such a positive impact on people she met every day. She is a huge loss to the community but a great teacher and example to all.’

Breda was relatively young to die but in those years of living she has left the world a better place.