Tuesday, April 14, 2020

Describing yourself in 12 words

This week's Independent News & Media Irish regional newspapers' column.

Michael Commane
Last Saturday week there was an obituary of Skibbereen GP Michael Boland in ‘The Irish Times’.

I had never heard of Michael Boland but I can imagine most doctors and every GP in the country knew him or had heard about him.

He was president of the World Organisation of Family Doctors (Wonca) between 2001 and 2004. 

Among the various jobs he did in his 32 years as a GP in Skibbereen was chairman of the Office of Tobacco Control, which oversaw the introduction of the smoking ban.

These days the World Health Organisation (WHO) features in the media every day. Dr Boland played a significant role in WHO’s current policy for primary health care.

In 2004 he was asked by The Irish Times to describe himself in 12 words for a feature they were writing about him. His reply: ‘Failed obsessional; relaxed Catholic; unelected politician; international Irishman; specialised generalist; ageing juvenile.

Isn’t it pure genius, brilliant. And it has a great sense of humour about it too.

Anyone who has ever worked as a subeditor or a proofreader learns early in the job that people tend to overwrite. 

Newspapers are inundated with reams of words. And the more incompetent the writer, you can be sure, the more she or he will write. 

And to make it more annoying they will also think that every word they put down on the paper plays an integral and essential role in the story.

Subeditors and proofreaders learn quickly how to use a scalpel.

The late Dr Boland’s words would be a delight to receive in any newspaper office.

Like any piece of good writing, it’s so easy to associate with what he says, or at least to think that he may be talking about the reader.

I’m certainly a failed obsessional. How many times do I go back and check the hall door, at least I did, in those halcyon days when I could leave the house. All the times I get out of the bed to make sure I turned off the tap in the bathroom. 

No doubt Dr Boland is talking about deeper and more consequential matters, but I have an inclination of what he is saying. 

I’m certainly a ‘relaxed Catholic’. And I know exactly what Dr Boland is saying and can imagine I would have agreed with him on most of his ‘relaxed Catholic’ views.

As to being an unelected politician, I have never been elected to any position in the Dominican Order. Something I see these days as a badge of honour. 

During my younger years and travelling backwards and forwards to Germany I fancied myself as a humble international Irishman. 

As to being a specialised generalist, I’m more inclined to consider myself a specialised messer. 

But it’s the last one that bowls me over. He sees himself as an ageing juvenile. It fits me to a tee. If anyone tells me I don’t look my age, of course I’m chuffed but quickly reply, that I have never acted my age and am delighted about that now.

You know, I had almost missed reading that obituary. Someone brought me the paper on the Saturday but I had put it away in an effort to decontaminate it. It was the following day that a friend colleague brought it to my attention.

The world of words, that’s right in front of our eyes, is spectacular. So often we discover them by accident or in a roundabout manner. Isn’t that the story of our lives?

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