This week’s column in The Kerryman newspaper.
Michael Commane
It was dusk, heading towards darkness when I entered a Lidl shop on Monday. Directly at the barrier to enter the shop there was a young boy, probably 12 or 13, wearing a bicycle helmet. He was obstructing the entrance so I kindly excused myself; I did notice it took him a few seconds to react but I paid no more attention to him and went about my shopping.
Later at the self service check out I spotted him again, this time he was with another boy of similar age. He was having difficulty with the self-service till and in the process he was shouting the F-word to his friend.
Wisely or unwisely I suggested to him that I’d prefer not to have to hear such vulgarities in a public place. He had no difficulty staring at me with a warning and threatening look. I carried on with my check out, paid and packed my groceries.
When I came out of the shop both boys were hanging about on their bicycles. As soon as I appeared they started shouting repeatedly the F-word at the top of their voices. I presume they were waiting for me to react.
Yes, I can still remember as a child how we would on occasion ‘look for a chase’ or indeed in the classroom how we would know what buttons to press with specific teachers. I think I can say it was all good innocent fun. But this was different; these two chaps were close to being intimidating. I did not react to their taunting, got on my bicycle and cycled home. En route I did check a number of times if they were following me, no, there was no sign of them. But even the fact that I thought they might be, surely is worrying.
I’ve been thinking about both boys. Wondering what their home-life is about, are there problems in their homes, is there a shortage of money, problems with alcohol or drug abuse. It struck me how vulnerable these two boys would be to getting caught up in the world of drugs.
And how do we prevent it? I came across this quote in a newspaper article and it reminded me again about the two young boys I met. It’s from the Irish writer, philosopher and parliamentarian Edmund Burke:
‘The law touches us but here and there, and now and then. Manners are what vex or soothe, corrupt or purify, exalt or debase, barbarise or refine us, by a constant, steady, uniform, insensible operation, like that of the air we breathe in.’
Burke was born in Dublin in1729 and died in England in 1797. He was a cousin of Nano Nagle, founder of the Presentation Sisters.
When you hear the most powerful man in the world call someone a scumbag and say that he was delighted to hear that former FBI director Robert Muller had died, the world must be in a strange place.
What’s happening?
But it’s not just Trump who behaves as a barbarian. Is it possible to go through a day without hearing the F-word? I doubt it. After all, our behaviour does matter and Burke makes great sense. Good manners refine and exalt us.
