Mix of poor road signage and panic leads to disaster

Below is this week's INM Irish regional newspaper column.

Michael Comamne

What do you do when you are frazzled or when you panic?

Last Monday week was cold and windy but it was also a showery day, at least in Dublin.

I was asked to visit an elderly sick man and his wife in Raheny. It meant travelling across the city, beginning in Rathgar.

I decided to go on the motorbike. The wind had calmed down and the showers were infrequent. Spent about five minutes gearing up for the bike and just as I wheeled the machine out of the garage the heavens opened. After 10 seconds I decided it would be mad to drive a bike in that weather. So off in the car.

With minor irritations and one or two long waits I got to Raheny. I was going to a place called Bettyglen, spent 30 minutes looking for the apartment.  No good. Yes, I did call the mobile number but that too was no good.

Eventually I discovered that there was another Bettyglen in Raheny.  Where else but Ireland could that happen? So off I drive to the second Bettyglen. No success there either. Eventually I get through on the number to discover that they live in the first Bettyglen. At last I am there.

The confusion and irritation faded quickly as I was received like a long lost son. They were a delightful couple.

But I’m watching the clock as I don’t want to get caught in rush-hour traffic on the way home. So after 30 minutes I’m off. This time I decide to use the East-Link bridge. It would mean that I could avoid the city centre. Clever idea. Or was it?

I had used the toll bridge before. Alas, this time I ended up at the entrance to the port tunnel, heading in the direction of the airport. Okay, I may not be the cleverest motorist on the road but I can see and read. The signage which should be clear and visible to direct one to the East-Link bridge is simply not to be seen.

Has it ever dawned on you how poor road signage is in Ireland? It’s worse than shocking. Or is it that county councils, the NRA and RSA have all been away ahead of their times and always knew that eventually GPSs would be available to show people how to get from A to B. Indeed, there’s an idea.

Do you remember the time they gave us all a millennium tree and candle or the time they gave us the iodine tablets in case of nuclear fallout?  Why not give everyone in the country a GPS? But they too are not infallible.

One of the funniest and really most meaningless signs is that infamous ‘All Other Routes/Gach Treo Eile’.

I eventually arrive home. The expedition began at approximately 13.30 and was completed at 17.20. How do people spend so much time in traffic jams? How do motorists grow accustomed to infuriating signage? What do people not familiar with areas do, who don’t have GPSs?

I’ve been thinking about my cross-city expedition. In future, whatever the weather, I’ll be leaving the car at home. Public transport or the motorbike.

But maybe there’s more to it than that. There is too. At some stage on that journey I began to panic. It’s taken me a long time to learn that panic makes me moribund, irritable and close to stupid as well.

The signage might be bad but like everything in life, there was more to it than that. ‘A bad worker always blames his/her tools.’ Still, Irish road signage is appalling.